You Know You're a CF Parent When...

I've seen people do these in the past and one was just posted on Facebook and it made me want to post it too!  I've "borrowed" from Lisa Greene, Kimberly Hasson and Marcy @ Lovin Lane.

You Know You're a CF Parent When...

*You clean out your purse and the bottom is full of enzymes instead of loose change and gum wrappers.
*You look at nutritional labels to find items with the most calories and fat instead of the other way around!
*Your friends call you when their kid is sick instead of their pediatrician.
*You snitch salt packets and stash them in your purse, car and diaper bag.
*You want your kids to eat all of their dessert instead of all of their vegetables.
*The older your child gets, the heavier you get!
*You are a mobile germ control unit.
*Your refrigerator and kitchen counters look like a pharmacy.
*You call hamburgers, french fries and milk shakes "health food."
*Your highly-trained ears can hear another person coughing from a mile away. 
*People think you’re nuts when you say “Wow! That was a good cough!”
*You find yourself discussing private bodily functions over the family dinner table.
*You know more medical terminology than some professionals.
*When you go out to dinner on a date night, you still get out the enzymes!
*You can flush a picc line faster than a nurse.
*You are a doctor, nurse, lawyer, pharmacist, accountant and child psychiatrist all in the same body!
*You've used puppets, toys, sung, danced, pleaded and generally made a fool out of yourself all in an effort to get your child to eat.
*You've stockpiled enough applesauce to start your own factory.
*You add salt to everything and use butter as a general cooking base even when a recipe doesn't call for it.
*You panic when your child sneezes.
*Your child coughs and you immediately chant "albuterol four times a day!"
*You're house has more medications than the pharmacy.
*You've actually found yourself explaining a medication to the pharmacist, instead of the other way around.
*You've prayed for your child to be fat.
*Purel and Lysol are in every room in your house.
*You have multiple doctors on speed dial.
*You've bought a fancy baby scale for peace of mind.
*You've cried over half a pound.
*Your child comes with an instruction manual if you leave them with a babysitter.
*Your child has started trying to do their own CPT.
*You've forgotten to put meds in the nebulizer and actually let it run several minutes before discovering the problem.
*Your child's vest machine has logged more hours than your car has miles.
*You think it's normal to spend four hours at the doctor's office for a regular visit.
*Your child could start her own medical practice, she has so many doctor's kits & medical related toys.
*Half of your child's vocabulary consists of medical terms.
*You fear Chucky Cheese and other similar festering germ pools
*You've developed sick child radar and can instantly spot a runny nose from across the room.
*You own more children's movies than Blockbuster because they're useful for treatment time and during those long stays in the hospital.
*You have entire drawers and cabinets devoted to your child's medical equipment.
*The nurses at the hospital and doctors office know you on sight.
*You own a medical-grade stethoscope and have learned to use it
*You resort to every kind of bribery known to accomplish treatments and have NO guilt about it what so ever.
*You have no guilt piling on extra sour cream, butter and everything fattening to everything they eat.
*You DARE anyone to mess with this child, and if they do, you pray you are having a really good day!
*You are considering going to the school and requesting that they repeal the "Perfect Attendance Award", because you have nightmares about what the child sitting next to yours is suffering from.
*You ask the Lab if they can take some of your blood (for no reason) just so your child doesn't have to do it alone.
*You try and create wonderful Milkshake concoctions, that are so irresistible your child can not turn them away, and you are begging God to give you the will power not to eat them.
*You have NO problem what so ever recreating the "Give my daughter the shot" scene from Terms of Endearment, whenever your child is not receiving good treatment, and the more you reinact it you realize you may be up for a actress of the year award.
 *You look often at your child, pondering where in the world he receives his courage from, cuz it far surpasses your own.
*You can care for your special child better than anyone else in the universe.